Week 5 Story: Rocky 7

(Rocky Balboa: Alatele fr, Flickr)

Rocky Balboa, and his lesser known brother Bullwinkle, were gifted fighters at a very young age. Rocky, who was only sixteen, was destined to become a champion when his time came. One day, the retired fighter Apollo Creed came to visit Mick, Rocky’s trainer, to ask for a favor. Apollo explained how gang members were vandalizing his gyms across Philadelphia and he needed Rocky’s help to beat them up since he would go to jail for assaulting minors. Mick did not want Rocky to get injured, but Apollo was one of his closest friends so he agreed to let Rocky go with him. Apollo also insisted on bringing Bullwinkle in case there were too many gang members for Rocky to handle on his own.

The three of them drove to the only gym that had not been vandalized yet. They waited in a dark alleyway which had a good vantage point of where the gang members would most likely target. It was around midnight when Rocky and Bullwinkle sprung into action after seeing suspicious shadows moving around the gym. There were five gang members dressed in all black holding cans of spray paint about to deface yet another one of Apollo’s gyms. Right when they were about to start, they heard the thunderous footsteps of Rocky coming towards them. At first, they couldn’t see who it was, but soon they realized it was Rocky, the greatest fighter in Philly, and all of them decided to run away except for one.

The brave soul who decided to stay and fight was by the smallest and youngest of the group. He couldn’t have been older than twelve years old, but he pulled out a pocket knife and rushed towards Rocky and Bullwinkle. Seeing how young the boy was, Rocky and Bullwinkle decided to dodge the attacks instead of throwing any punches themselves. This went on for awhile until Apollo screamed from the car, “Finish him already!”. Bullwinkle punched the boy in the stomach and Rocky struck him with a mean left hook. The boy was instantly knocked out, but still breathing since Rocky didn’t want to kill him. Apollo came up to Rocky and Bullwinkle and gave them praises on how well they defended his gym. The next day, Apollo bought Rocky all the best boxing equipment that money could buy to help him on his journey of becoming a world champion.

Author's Note: For this week, I chose the story of Ramayana to retell. Rama is the reincarnation of the god Vishnu. Rama, the prince of his city, is loved by all his people and a very talented fighter. One day when Rama and his brother are young, a sage named Vishvamitra asks Rama's father if he can take Rama to help save his hermitage that is being ravaged by demons. He takes the two brothers to a jungle where they encounter a female shape-shifting demon. Since she is a female, the brothers hesitate to kill her. They eventually work together to kill her though. Vishvamitra was happy and summoned celestial weapons for Rama. I changed Rama to be Rocky Balboa, the fictional boxer, and Vishvamitra to be Apollo Creed who is also from the Rocky movies. I changed the demon to be a young gang member whom Rocky and his brother would be hesitant to beat up since he was so little. Apollo is happy and rewards Rocky with state of the art boxing equipment. I also changed Rama's brother's name to Bullwinkle because it was funny and I couldn't think of any other name that would work. 

Bibliography: Ramayana by Donald A. Mackenzie

Reading Notes: Ramayana, Part B

(Sita Longs for the Golden Deer: Wikimedia Commons)

I like how Surpanakha immediately fell in love with Rama. It just shows how amazing Rama truly was since everyone, including the sister of Ravana, loved and admired him.

I found it funny how they first attacked Rama with fourteen demons but then increase it to fourteen thousand demons. If I retell this part I will probably include a ridiculously high number of demons to attack Rama.

The battle between Rama and the demons could be made longer and more epic so the reader could truly appreciate Rama’s superiority in combat.

I could make Maricha change into something else like a really nice car instead of a golden deer to make the story more modern.

The scene where Ravana talks to Sita caught my attention because it seems like Sita is bragging about Rama’s power and then Ravana retaliates and tries to build up his own reputation. This could be made more comical by making them keep exchanging words on how the other is better.

I don’t like how much Rama grieves for Sita. I know that he loves her, but I would rather see him being bloodthirsty and destroying everything in his path to get her back.

I found it funny how Ravana is trying to hit on Sita but he can’t do anything about it since Brahma cursed him a long time ago.

Instead of all of these different animals, I could retell it by replacing them with military items like planes and stuff like that to go find Sita.

Once again, Ravana trying to get with Sita is a part that could be retold in a more comical way.

The part where Rama gets mad and starts basically attacking the ocean was funny to me. It shows how badly he wants to see Sita, but at the same time he is shooting arrows at a body of water. I know that it isn’t exactly just a body of water, but not knowing the god of the ocean would react to this makes it funny in retrospect.

If I retell the part of the war beginning I will be sure to include epic battle scenes and possibly some gruesome descriptions.

I found it interesting how Ravana cried for his son since he is a demon. There are many instances in this story that give Ravana human emotions that you wouldn’t normally associate with demons or evil spirits.

The way that Rama defeats Ravana wasn’t as climactic as I expected. I will probably make it more intense if I retell this part.

I thought it was kind of messed up how Rama basically accused Sita of sleeping with Ravana. I don’t like how this scene progressed so I will leave it out.

The ending was completely unexpected and I was not a fan of it. I will change the ending to make it more of a happier ending because I feel like how that’s how the story should’ve ended. 

Bibliography: Ramayana by Donald A. Mackenzie

Reading Notes: Ramayana Part A

(Painted cloth depicting a scene from the Ramayana: Wikimedia Commons)

There have been some words that I don’t know and names I can’t remember in this story. In my retelling, I will most likely keep it simpler as to not confuse the reader.

I like how they explained the city, but I think it would be interesting to completely change it and make it into a wasteland.

Instead of a horse sacrifice, there could be something funny or bizarre that has to be done because I am not a fan of the sacrificial ceremonies.

It is interesting how Ravana can be beat by men and apes. In my retelling, I will probably replace apes with something completely different.

I like how they went through so much trouble to figure out why Rama was crying. It was funny how it ended up being such an easy fix.

If I retell this part, I will focus more on the Rama’s education in combat, archery, and other areas like that because I feel like that would be the most interesting to talk about.

The scene where Rama gets celestial weapons is awesome and I will try to incorporate that in my retelling by making the weapons more high-tech and modern.

I like the idea of the unbreakable bow, but I would like to make it a different weapon. Also, it would be funny if Rama struggled at first and then was able to break it after several attempts.

I really don’t like how Manthara was able to manipulate Kaikeyi. I usually do not like when stories have these kinds of people in them, so I will most likely not retell this part or completely change it. I would have Dasaratha just let her drink the poison or trick her in some way where she does not get her way.

I would probably have Rama call upon his celestial weapons and threaten Kaikeyi with them after she tells him what she has his father to do.

I like how Sita and Lakshmana are willing to go into exile with Rama. It shows how great of a person Rama is if people are willing to sacrifice their own lives just to be with him.

The scene that describes how Dasaratha was cursed is extremely emotional. The parents of the boy he killed cried out for him and said a lot of things that are depressing to read, but it made it a powerful and memorable part of the story.

I really like the fact that Bharata wasn’t evil like his mother. It is nice to see that he didn’t accept the throne and wanted Rama to have it.

At first, I didn’t like how Rama wasn’t going to go back to the city because I thought it was a matter a pride. However, he made good points as to why he has to stay in the jungle and I will keep that ending in the retelling

Bibliography: Ramayana by Donald A. Mackenzie